SELYA, Circuit Judge.
In one of Shakespeare's most celebrated works, Polonius famously tells Laertes: "Neither a borrower nor a lender be." William Shakespeare, Hamlet act 1, sc. 3 (circa 1603). This case reaffirms the wisdom of that admonition. The tale follows.
Many of the relevant facts are uncontroversial. It is undisputed that Néstor González-Romero (González), a citizen and resident of Puerto Rico, approached his erstwhile friend...
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